Transformation. It is a word we use to describe the work people do together to overcome the habits of an oppressive social system and learn instead about non oppressive ways of being. There are many good anti racism trainers out there, and through the Unitarian Universalist Association I can even invite an anti racism training team to come to my congregation.
The first anti oppressive collective, I belonged to was a group of men working to overcome patriarchal ways of being. We didn't have a trainer, but there was plenty of literature on patriarchy available, and yes, lots of women had published their observations of ways in which men's behavior was oppressive. We could be open and honest about our lives, and share with each other why we wanted to change.
Later I was part of a group of men who identified as Native Americans. We were from different traditions and none of us shared a common "tribe." We lived in Boston, and we knew that we could not be Indians alone. We also knew that we had work to do as men in relationship to being true to our heritage. Every man in that weekly conversation (that went on for over a year) agreed that male supremacy was not compatible with the way of our ancestors, and that patriarchy had been learned from our conquerors.
Since then I have participated in anti racism trainings, "transformation teams" and other People of Color collectives. But none of these groups talk about patriarchy anymore. That is too bad, because I think we still have work to do.
I don't think we can dismantle racism, unless we work at the same time on gender and class oppression. And that will be the work of several generations. When I a young activist I was convinced we could finish the work in my lifetime. Oh well.
That was thirty five years ago. I am less defensive about being a male than I was before those discussions, more aware of how destructive male supremacy is, and have observed how deeply imbedded male supremacy is in our society. But young men don't have these conversations any more, and they do have work to do.
